How’ve you been, really?

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One of my best friends made a gem of a statement the other day that started me thinking about friendship and mindfulness.  We’ve been best friends since we were kids and have stayed best friends even as careers and families kept us geographically distant the last few decades.

Although we live in separate parts of the country at the moment, whenever we catch up, often months apart, it feels like it was yesterday since we spoke.  When we fill each other in on what’s been happening, my friend described it like we both have these ’bonus bubbles of life’ between our catch ups.  As if the real world is the brief time we spend together, everything else has a sense of scripted alternate reality. Goes to show how present we are and invested in the moment when we’re together. Mmm sounds like we’re being mindful. Continue reading →

Listen … did you hear that?

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Being more mindful is a growing practice, in more ways than one. Taking the benefits as read, (more peace of mind and wellbeing, greater focus, creativity and better relationships) how could you start being mindful?

Now the thought of beginning a mindfulness practice, like anything new, can be a bit overwhelming (which is kind of funny when you think that mindfulness is supposed to reduce stress and increase focus). However, I have a simple way to start and you don’t need expensive equipment or fancy outfits and there’s no need to sit cross-legged on the floor (luckily for me as I tend to keel over in about 15 seconds when I do).

So here’s my tip for heading down the road to mindfulness. Continue reading →

Are you a doer or a watcher?

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Are you living fully, totally engaged in every moment of your life, good or bad?

Are you a doer? Do you feel the fear and do it anyway; sometimes succeeding, stumbling, soaring, falling, failing, sharing your gifts, your vulnerability and putting yourself out there?

Or are you a watcher? Do you live on the sidelines, wishing your lot was different, always observing, expert at judging and advising others, waiting until it’s perfect before you begin? Continue reading →

Would you rather be passionate or enthusiastic?

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A few years ago I heard Joseph Campbell’s exhortation to ‘follow your bliss’ and I thought, ‘Love it, I’m in!’ The full quote is “follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls” (thanks to my niece Erin for the introduction to Mr Campbell).  It sounded like a brilliant philosophy to someone like me whose bliss was way down the bottom of the ‘to do’ list.

Now, as I tend to do with anything new, I leapt into this new way of being with spontaneous and careless abandon.  And once I’d moved past the sticking point of – ‘What was my bliss, what joy did I want to pursue, what did I love to be or do with a passion that I was compelled to follow?’(more on this another time) – then life was looking good.

For a while… Continue reading →

Let’s talk about something that matters

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Conversations with purpose make us happier. I knew science would support me eventually, conversations with purpose certainly make me happy. There’s nothing I like more than a chat about stuff that matters with one or more people who are really present and engaged. Researchers say that “the happy life is social rather than solitary and conversationally deep rather than superficial”

The article also uses one of my favourite quotes from Socrates “the unexamined life is not worth living”. Now before you say ‘too much navel gazing’ and click elsewhere this doesn’t mean we need to spend hours pondering every nuance of the deep mysteries of life and picking apart our every experience. While the authors suggest that deep conversations actually make people happier and instill a sense of meaning in the interaction partners, the definition of what makes a substantive conversation is individual. It could be a chat about the state of our health system, your upcoming mortgage payment or the world shortage of bees. Continue reading →

What lights you up?

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Wow, I went to a breakfast chat the other day by Mel Neil from the Langley Group on positive psychology in the workplace, and what lights you up.

How freaking fabulous was that chat! And the thing that got me is that she showed us the science behind it.

I can’t help it, call me a nerd, but I love it when science validates what you’ve been intuitively doing for years. I love the figures and the graphs and most of all I love it when someone passionate gets really excited and tells you great stories about their stuff. Continue reading →

If it’s written down, it’s real

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I have this note on my desk that I read every time I sit down.

‘My writing matters’. My writing coach encouraged me to put it there to remind myself of what’s important to me. As I mentioned in my last blog, I dreamed of being a writer but got side-tracked with life and work and family.

So to add to Step 1, make my dream conscious, try this.  Step 2, write everything down, not just your dreams.   Continue reading →

Starting Fresh – its never too late…

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Hello and welcome, here we are at last, or at first really.  My first blog post.  The first day of autumn, an auspicious day for a new adventure.

Now you’re asking yourself, ‘she’s got ‘autumn’ and ‘auspicious’ and ‘adventure’ in one sentence why would I keep reading?’

Firstly, I don’t mind if you don’t.  Stop now, turn off whatever device you’re reading this on and go outside.  Breathe in deeply, stretch, and smile.  Off you go…

Still here?  OK.  Here’s the deal with me.  I love words and I believe they have the power to change lives.  And if we’re really honest, all of us could do with a little change somewhere in our lives. So, mostly what you’ll get will be words about inspiring, instructing or involving you to go and do something, something different, or at least to think about it differently.  To ‘be the change you want to see in the world’ as Ghandi said, words which, by the way, cover all three – they inspire, instruct and involve, works for me. Continue reading →